A Real-Life Case Study: Supporting Bilingual Children Abroad
Should we continue speaking Italian at home, or switch to German so our kids can adapt more quickly?
In today’s post, I want to share a case study from my early work as a multilingualism consultant, an experience that took place nearly ten years ago. The story involves an Italian family who had recently moved to Austria with their two young children, aged 3 and 5.
Like many families facing a new linguistic and cultural environment, they were unsure how to support their children’s language development while adapting to life abroad. Our work together began with a simple question: Should we keep speaking Italian at home, even if our kids are surrounded by German and English all day?
As happens often in multilingual families settled abroad, they were navigating uncharted territory. At home they spoke Italian. Outside, their children were exposed to German and English. And like so many parents, they were unsure whether they were making the “right” language choices.
This is a story I’ve heard again and again.
Language is more than just a tool, it’s home, heritage, emotion, and belonging. But when you’re raising children in a country where your native language isn’t spoken, questions arise quickly:
Should we switch to the local language at home?
Will our kids fall behind in school if we don’t?
Are we confusing them with too many languages?
These are valid concerns. But as this case study shows, the answers often lie not in switching languages, but in strengthening confidence.
From Italy to Austria: A New Life in Three Languages
This Italian family moved to Austria with their children. Overnight, they found themselves surrounded by German in daily life, while also interacting with English at the international kindergarten their children attended. Neither parent spoke German fluently. The pressure was immediate, and heavy.
At a multilingual seminar I led at their international preschool, they came across a simple idea that changed their perspective:
"Your language is a gift. Don’t be afraid to give it."
When parents find themselves immersed in a new linguistic environment, they often feel pressure to “fit in” quickly, especially for the sake of their children. But switching entirely to the majority language (in this case, German) can come at a cost: children may lose emotional connection to their roots, and parents may find themselves struggling to express warmth and discipline in a non-native language.
So we made a plan: keep Italian strong at home. Allow German and English to grow naturally through the environment, but never at the expense of emotional connection.
The School Challenge
As the children entered school age, the family faced a new set of challenges.
Despite their fluency in Italian and growing exposure to German, school environments often emphasized only the majority language. Teachers raised concerns about vocabulary. Reports hinted at “delays.”
Again, the parents felt immense pressure to switch to German even at home.
That’s when we had another conversation.
I reminded them: many educators are not trained in multilingual development. It’s common for multilingual children to appear “behind” their monolingual peers when assessed only in the school language. But that doesn’t mean they’re actually behind. Their total language competence may be far more advanced, it’s simply spread across languages.
Together, we discussed strategies:
🎯 Keeping Italian alive through daily rituals (bedtime stories, games, and songs)
🎯 Supporting German through exposure (books, playdates, media, but never forced at home)
🎯 Clarifying to teachers what the family’s multilingual journey looked like
🎯 Helping the children build confidence in all their languages, without shame or pressure
As the mother later shared after one of my parents seminar:
“The last seminar at our school on “School and Bilingualism’”was incredibly useful. It gave our whole family a way to face everyday challenges. The best part is listening to real stories from people from different countries, with the same doubts and struggles. It makes you feel less alone.”
Why Speaking the Family Language Matters
Language is connection. It’s the way a parent soothes a child after a bad day. The way jokes and family traditions are passed down. The way identity is shaped.
When parents abandon their home language out of fear, something vital is lost, not only words, but emotion and cultural continuity.
And yet, parents are often told:
“Focus on the majority language, or your child will struggle.”
“Don’t confuse them with too many languages.”
“Just speak German at home: it’s easier.”
But research and real-life experience tell us otherwise. Children are capable of becoming multilingual when supported with consistency, meaningful input, and emotional security.
And maintaining the family language can actually help their learning, by supporting cognitive development, literacy, and identity.
It’s never about choosing one language. It’s about giving your child a complete toolbox.
What the Experts Say
When we think of language, we often think of vocabulary and grammar. But what about:
Identity?
Confidence?
Cultural belonging?
At our recent online Parent Seminar, co-led with multilingual speech therapist Sofia Zelou, we explored the most pressing challenges that multilingual families face, including:
Why children sometimes refuse to speak one of their languages
How to respond to fears of confusion or delay
What to say when others tell you to “just stick with one language”
Before the event, we surveyed dozens of families. We gathered real concerns, real pain points, and real questions. Then, we built a practical, supportive guide.
This family’s story is not an exception. It’s part of a larger pattern, and our goal is to give families tools and confidence to walk this journey with clarity.
Key Takeaways for Families Living Abroad
Speak your native language with your children, every day.
It’s the language of your heart, and it’s essential for emotional bonding.Don’t fear the local language, embrace it gradually.
Children will learn it through school and social interactions. You can support it, but don’t replace your home language.Advocate for your child at school.
Explain your multilingual journey to teachers. Help them see your child’s full picture.Seek community and support.
Whether through seminars, online groups, or local meetups, connect with other multilingual families.Normalize the challenges.
Language refusal, mixed codes, delayed milestones, these are common. You’re not failing. You’re navigating complexity.
A Word from the Family
“We didn’t know what to do at first. After Karin’s seminar, we were sure: Italian at home. The reassurance and clear information helped us create a language environment that works for our kids. Every family should have access to this kind of support.”
Years have passed since that first meeting, and to me, the most rewarding part of my work supporting families and educators is meeting them again after some time.
These once-young children are now confident multilingual teenagers, navigating life across cultures with curiosity and ease. Their story is a reminder that early choices matter, and that with the right support, multilingualism can truly become a strength for life.
🎥 Ready to Go Deeper?
If this story resonated with you and you're looking to better understand how to raise multilingual children in a multicultural environment, our parent seminar is exactly what you need. Together with multilingual speech therapist Sofia Zelou, I’ll guide you through the most common challenges and offer practical, compassionate strategies rooted in years of experience.
We'd be honoured to support you on this journey. The online class includes:
Expert guidance on language refusal
Case studies and parent testimonials
Practical tools for building a multilingual home
👉 Watch the parent seminar now
You don’t have to figure it all out alone.
Multilingual parenting is complex, but with the right support, it can also be one of the most rewarding journeys your family will ever take.